Today’s been quite the introspective day.
I woke up in a cloud of mood that I haven’t felt for a while; I felt a mixture of being sad, lonely and disappointed.
On days like this, it can go one of two ways; either I can fall into the pit that is feeling sorry for myself, lounge around and feel guilty about it later or I can try and climb out of my thoughts and into the present moment, which is so far from me being lonely and a disappointment to myself.
I laid in bed watching Claire Wineland’s My Last Days episode (LIFE-CHANGING, you HAVE to watch it). She speaks about living in the now. Not worrying about when you do or don’t have something but appreciating everything NOW. The pain, the joy, the annoyance that life brings. The ridiculous highs and the crashes of hitting rock bottom. It all makes the experience. This is life and it’s not something you can plan for, it just happens, moment to moment, whether we like it or not.
With that in mind, I decided today I was going to acknowledge the simple things in life.
I enjoyed dancing around my lounge to country music.
I realised I loved the sound of hot water being poured to make a cup of tea.
I noticed that baked courgette and mushrooms taste 100% better than fried.
I appreciated the act of cooking and taste of slow cooked food, with no distractions.
Life can be overwhelming, especially for an over-thinker, like myself.
I’m a sucker for thinking about a bigger picture, what is and isn’t to meant to happen or to be and get caught up with how I thought my life should go. I will go over consequence after consequence of my decisions and every single ‘what if?’ there is.
Today I was reminded that sometimes moment to moment is all we have, even if that moment is just sitting with a steaming hot cup of tea and focusing on that, instead of all the other emotions/thoughts that are bubbling around in your mind.
Life is going to happen anyway, are you going to choose to participate in every single moment we are blessed with, regardless of what that brings, whether joy or sadness, or are you going to let life happen to you and complain about it later?
I know which one I want to choose.
A friend once said to me…
‘If you want to date someone, do it. If you want to kiss someone, do it. If things don’t work out, move on. Don’t let anyone else define who you are. Spend money on things you want. Learn new skills. Put goodness into the world and find something you can become passionate about. Put yourself out there. Fuck shit up.’